November 29, 2005 4:38 pm

I will from now on remember that day as the day that a strong thread that practically held the patchwork of my happy childhood together was yanked clean, leaving me to try to hold together the unraveling pieces of my very existence. That very day I discovered that part of my childhood and now adulthood was a lie. I equate this experience to the fateful school bus ride home in the 2nd grade when Eric Imken told me that there was no such thing as Santa Clause. On November 29, at 4:38 pm I thumbed through my Entertainment Weekly and that's where I made my discovery. For 23 years, I have lived my life day in and day out thinking that the little kid's voice at the end of practically every show on TV would say "Sit, Booboo, sit. Good dog." This is not the case. The child actually says "Sit Ubu, sit. Good dog." There's no telling what kind of trauma this will cause me but luckily I'll be able to talk it through with the Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy. I can still count on them.